Ten Years Old Already?

Every week I participate in “Stream of Consciousness Sunday”, hosted by Fadra of AllThingsFadra.com. The idea is to type for 5 minutes, a brain dump of sorts, and then to publish without editing the writing at all.

My older girl Lakin will be 10 on Saturday, July 16th. I’m freaking out a little. 10 years old. TEN years old! Where in the hell did 10 years go? I remember the day she was born like it was yesterday. I remember it better than yesterday, in fact. I think being a mother must have done that to me… shortened the lifespan of my brain by a wee bit.

David & I did the last of our birthday present shopping today. Pokemon card sets and a do-it-yourself craft book that she’s been begging for… plus a little doodle journal that I know she will love. It’s not much, but for many years I wasn’t able to afford anything for her birthday, so I insist on getting something for her now, even if it will never compare (price-wise) to the big shiny whatever she gets from her dad.

I saw a rainbow layer cake on a friend’s facebook page and had her send me the recipe. We got all the gel colors and cake mix and whatnot, so we’re ready to create a beautiful birthday cake on Friday night after the girls go to bed. We’ll probably end up cooking out at my mom’s house for the party, which will be fun. We don’t go over there nearly as much as we used to, and the girls miss seeing their Grandma.

It will be fun. I’m looking forward to it, and I know Lakin is. I’m just… also kind of dreading it. I don’t handle my kids’ birthdays well, emotionally. It sounds a little silly, but I wish they’d just stay little for a little longer.

Ten Already? A Birthday Post!
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I'm Heather, a married mama of two teen girls, a stillborn baby girl (7/1/12), and a sweet and wild preschool girl (4/2/14). I've been blogging at The Destiny Manifest since 2001. I like to write about appreciating all of the beautiful little things that surround us, particularly in the face of grief, infant loss and mental health issues. Every day is an adventure!

Latest posts by Heather O. (see all)

  • phasesofme

    I know exactly how you feel! Mini-Me will be 18 in September and I’m just at a loss as to where those 18 years went!

    Watching them grow up can ne such a traumatic experience!


  • I can’t imagine how I’ll feel when mine are turning 18! That’s… only 8 years away! Yikes!

    Thank you for the hugs Crystal… it helps to hear that someone understands. 🙂

  • Good Girl Gone Green

    Thats party sounds like so much fun! And it’s not about the shiny gifts any ways. She knows her mama loves her and I  am sure you raised her to know all about that! Happy 10th birthday Lakin!! 🙂

  • I’m excited about the cake! Not eating it so much, but baking it. I’m not a baker or a cook usually, but I can picture it in my mind and it’s going to be so pretty! Now… to make it look like it does in my head. 😉

    You’re absolutely right about the shiny gifts. I wish I had more resources at times like this, but she knows I love her, even when all I’ve had to give her was a hug. 🙂