How Sweet the Sting

This week, I’m participating again in “Stream of Consciousness Sunday”, hosted by Jana of Jana’s Thinking Place. The idea is to type for 5 minutes, a brain dump of sorts, and then to publish without editing the writing at all.


Three years ago today, my oldest cousin Joshua Alva Kirkman died. He was 32 years old and living in Beijing, China at the time of his death. On the same day, just a couple of hours later, my sweet little niece Cori Aletta was born in Daigu, South Korea. It has always brought me much comfort to know that, in the face of the tragedy of losing a family member, we gained a family member as well.

I don’t believe in reincarnation, per se… but it is a beautiful thought that the death of Joshua and the birth of Cori are somehow connected. I found out a few weeks ago that my brother Colin and my sister-in-law Stephanie are pregnant with their second child. They found out they were pregnant on the day that we lost our darling Clara… and this feels somehow connected as well.

I wish that we could have Josh & Clara here with us, but if we had to lose those wonderful souls, at least we have Cori & the new little one to remind us of how sweet the sting of life can be.

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I'm Heather, a married mama of two teen girls, a stillborn baby girl (7/1/12), and a sweet and wild preschool girl (4/2/14). I've been blogging at The Destiny Manifest since 2001. I like to write about appreciating all of the beautiful little things that surround us, particularly in the face of grief, infant loss and mental health issues. Every day is an adventure!

Latest posts by Heather O. (see all)

  • Awww that was sweet. I think I would choose to believe that it was all connected as well. It feels better that way.

  • Oh, I have chills. What a beautiful connection you all clearly have. ((hugs))

  • I’m so sorry for your losses, but congratulations on your new little niece or nephew. My cousin is seven weeks away from her due date with her first baby, and I’m excited about having a new baby in the family.

  • Thanks for this, it’s wonderful Heather. I too feel they are connected. I wish Josh and Clara could be with us here too,

  • jamie@southmainmuse

    Birth and death are a part of all our stories. As is loss and grief. The hope of birth does lends a small glimmer of hope in the darkness of loss.

  • I believe they are with us, Isaac. I can’t explain that in a way that meshes with my religious or philosophical views on life… but I do believe it. As long as we remember them, they are with us.

  • Wandered by from SOCS …

    What a lovely post. Rarely are we allowed to see, so personally, the full circle of life. To know how closely joy and sadness are intertwined.