Share My Vantage Point

Last night, I saw a postdates mama (41 weeks pregnant) advised to “turn off the part of the brain that is telling you something is wrong”. This is a perfect example of why I feel strongly that the culture of a “perfect birth” can be very dangerous.

I didn’t see it until I had lived through it, and my baby hadn’t.

A vaginal birth is a beautiful thing. A healthy baby is so much more beautiful.

For the fortunate who have had both, it can be hard (almost impossible, it seems) to see that it is not right, healthy or ethical to push a woman to have her baby naturally, no matter what.

It’s not that simple for every woman, because every woman and every baby is different.

If you only know a person online, you are not qualified to give them medical advice. Too many pregnant women (myself, included) get stuck in the thought process that “they did it, so I can too”.

Maybe you can.┬áMaybe you can’t.

You can’t know that you should have done things differently until it is too late, and no one else should have to go through what our family is going through now.

I did not want a third c-section. I wanted a vaginal birth after cesarean very badly.

Right now, five months after our daughter was born still, I can tell you, without the slightest doubt in my mind, that I would endure a cesarean section every day this week if I could just have my baby back in my arms, alive and healthy.

Read what I have written. Learn from my mistakes and loss.

Click through and share “The Vantage Point of Hindsight” with anyone you know who is pregnant.

Share it for Clara.

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I'm Heather, a married mama of two teen girls, a stillborn baby girl (7/1/12), and a sweet and wild preschool girl (4/2/14). I've been blogging at The Destiny Manifest since 2001. I like to write about appreciating all of the beautiful little things that surround us, particularly in the face of grief, infant loss and mental health issues. Every day is an adventure!

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