Katie is One Years Old!

Our darling Katie is one years old today! At 10:55 in the morning one year ago, this precious rainbow baby entered our lives and changed them forever. She’s eased the pain of my greatest loss in a way that I didn’t think would ever be possible.

Katie is a funny and wonderful little piece of our hearts, and to use an overused cliche, she’s the light of our lives. She weighs 25 lbs and is 30″ long… 90th percentile, pretty much across the board. This makes me incredibly happy, especially because she had such a hard time gaining weight when she was younger, prompting the frenulectomy that released her very tight tongue tie.

 

Katie took her first steps this past Sunday, but she can walk easily and quickly when holding our hands. She crawls like the wind and speeds up when we chase after her. She laughs and it sounds like everything good in the world. She makes jokes and blows bubbles on our arms because it makes us laugh, which makes her laugh. She is happy, incarnate.

 

At one years old, Katie can say all of our names: Mama, Dada, Ay-a (Addah), and Laylay (Lakin). She knows our kitties are “Cat” (Miss Kitty Cat) and “At-at” (Atlas). She points and says “go” and “dat” (that). She loves to play Pat-A-Cake and turn her music box on and off. She mostly sleeps in her crib, side-car to my side of the bed, but always ends up cuddling up with me before the night is over. She eats just about everything we eat, but still thinks “bubu” (her word for nursing) is the best ever.

 

I won’t say it’s not incredibly hard sometimes, wondering what it would be like to have Katie’s big sister Clara running around, almost 3 years old now. I would absolutely love to watch my two youngest daughters playing together… building with blocks, splashing in the bathtub, arguing over who gets to play with which Little People. I envision how it could be (should be); sometimes it makes me smile, and sometimes it makes me very sad. I would be lying if I said that I didn’t wish it could be so, every single day.

 

If I’ve learned nothing else in the last 3 years, it’s to be grateful for every moment that we are granted with the ones we love and treasure, and I have tried to soak up each tiny second with this wonderful rainbow baby of ours. She is amazing.

Happy 1st Birthday, sweet Kate!

 

The First Seven Months

I wish that I had done a better job of blogging about the first seven months of Katie’s life, because I am finding it hard to recall all the little details, in hindsight. A large part of these months has been a blur of sleepless nights and very busy days.

The best I can do is to give you a pictorial timeline of how much this darling little baby has changed over these seven months. Since she was born, she has gone from a quiet happy baby who loves nothing better than to nurse and cuddle with her mama, to a bigger (and less quiet) happy baby who loves nothing better than to nurse and cuddle with her mama, when she’s not trying to master crawling, or pulling up to stand, or giggling like a wild thing at her big sisters.

Katie-One-Month

Katie-Two-Months

Katie-Three-Months

Katie-Four-Months

Katie-Five-Months

Katie-Six-Months

SAMSUNG CAMERA PICTURES

Seven months seemed to fly by in the blink of my eyes, and then yesterday, Katie turned eight months old. She is fun, and funny, and gets very excited when we sing “Itsy Bitsy Spider” and count her piggies as they’re going to the market. Her first word was “Addah”, followed quickly by “Dada” and “Bubu” (when she wants to nurse). She has two bottom teeth and is working on the top two.  She sleeps well, once she’s done fighting sleep each night, and her favorite place to sleep is curled up with Mama or Daddy.

She is a joy, truly and completely.

I won’t say it’s always been easy, these past seven months. In fact, it’s been pretty hard at times. I’m not the energetic early-twenty-something I was when my big girls were born, nor am I the more relaxed version of myself that I was when I was pregnant with Clara. In some ways, I feel like a first-time mother again, worrying over every tiny cry or bump, checking her breathing a hundred times a night to make sure that she is, in fact, still breathing. Her sister Clara’s death has made me a more vigilant parent than I was, even with Lakin and Addah. I’m not sure if that’s a good thing, or a bad thing, but it is who I am, as a parent, now.

I am also more aware of what a treasure Katie is, and I make a point to appreciate the little things: her tiny fingers curling around mine, and the way her bottom lip quivers when she falls asleep after nursing. Packaged along with the pain of loss, I have discovered the gift of appreciation for every moment with this wonderful baby.

She’s growing up so fast, and so healthy, and that, too, is a gift, one that makes every day feel like Christmas morning.

Katie-Eight-Months